Happy Valentine’s Day. Now please accept this tub of ice cream.

Last night, I stopped by Walmart to pick up some groceries.

I ended up near the Valentine’s Day aisles watching in awe as multiple men bought oversized stuffed bears, painfully fake plastic roses, and heart shaped chocolates, all the while thinking: REALLY? 

tumblr_inline_mocdhuY8B01qz4rgpI mean come on guys.

She needs that oversized stuffed bear like you need more tampons in your medicine cabinet. And yet in the hours leading up to the clock striking midnight on Valentine’s Day — you’re running out of options.

And you’re not bringing the A-game like the guy I saw in line buying a card with a large La Senza bag filled with the goods.

That guy. That guy is getting some tonight.

Now, maybe I’m just jaded. After all, I was seen leaving Walmart with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s Half Baked in tow.

I’m just saying. Us single girls have the propensity to beat ourselves up about being single today. And yes. Maybe you are missing out on some negligee from Victoria’s Secret, a little blue box from Tiffany’s, or a five course meal at your city’s finest restaurant (expectations, I don’t have them at all, whatsoever).

But you could also be missing out on an oversized teddy bear bought out of desperation.

 No. No you can’t eat a giant stuffed teddy bear. Or your feelings.

So before this happens….

Ask yourself: oversized teddy bear?

Or new Kate Spade bag, a tub of Ben & Jerry’s, a bottle of wine, and maybe even a pizza for yourself just because you can?

I rest my case.

It’s Valentine’s Day. It’s ok to feel sorry for yourself and as a result — treat yourself.

In fact, I strongly encourage it.

x C x

A/N: Though most of you know me and know that I am in NO way crapping on the celebrating of Valentine’s Day — I still feel that I need to tell you all: I LOVE, LOVE. Be happy. Have the most romantic date (seriously, one of my favorite dates of my life was a 2nd date on Valentine’s Day) and if you really really want and would love an oversized teddy bear? I hope you get it and I hope that it doesn’t take up too much room in the bed and interfere with your Valentine’s Day romance. OH and happy birthday to one of my favorite people in the world: Heidi!!!! Welcome to the thirties! They just got even more fabulous with you in them! xo

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